Weaver, the Hammerer
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Nicknames The Executioner
Gender Male
Race Dwarf
Affiliations Spearbreakers
Occupations Clothier
Guard Captain
Birth 1st Granite 129 PS

Weaver (1st Granite 129 PS - ) is the Spearbreakers Hammerer, and has been since the early summer of 204, during Sus's reign. He has very rarely been mentioned by overseers, as his primary duty is a clothier, while he's not bashing skulls in with his warhammer. It is worth noting that he is an ardent worshipper of a human vampire, which is unusual, considering that all Everoc's vampires died during the Vampiric Wars.


While he goes unnoticed by most, it is surprising considering his girth. The Spearbreakers census marks him as "corpulent". His eyes are a red-brown, and his hair is ecru with a touch of gray. His skin is pale pink, but he attempts to make up for it with an incredibly long mustache and beard - despite his short hair. His other features are less attractive - a hooked nose, thick lips, a broad chin, and worst, tall ears.

As far as physical features go, he is physically weak. This may be part of the reason he was chosen as Hammerer. Fortunately for him, he is almost never sick.


Little can be said in a positive light of Weaver's personality, besides that he has an iron will and a great musical sense. Unfortunately, he also has a shortage of patience, a meager vocabulary, little creativity, poor analytical abilities, bad intuition and a very, very bad memory. This last might also be a reason for him being chosen as Hammerer, in hopes that he might forget his duties.

Weaver is very self-conscious, a bad attribute for someone of his weight. He lives life at a leisurely pace, getting to work when he feels like he needs to instead of on the dot - again, it may have been another reason Sus chose him as Hammerer. He takes time making decisions, too. He is bored by reality and has a wonderful imagination, but due to his lack of creativity and eloquence of speech, he can never put any of these into any art form. He does, however, enjoy listening to music appropriate for his mood.

As might be expected, Weaver dislikes intellectual discussions and debates, preferring to leave politics to the politicians.

Spearbreakers CareerEdit

Weaver arrived at Spearbreakers in the early autumn of 200, during Splint's first reign. This makes him effectively one of the very first migrants to the fortress. Splint promptly gave him the military callsign "Weaver", and he has used it ever since without complaint. This is largely due to the fact that he worked at Spearbreakers for four years as a clothier and leatherworker before he was assigned his duty as hammerer.

Weaver has never had to execute anyone during his entire career. He came close to executing Urist Okablokum and Hans after they assisted Vanya Carena in her mistake, but Colonel Fischer intervened when Vanya brought her a note from Mr Frog instructing him to stop. With this being such a rare event, it explains why a small crowd was present at the would-be execution - it had never been witnessed at Spearbreakers before.